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I desperately wanted more faith in certain areas, but I was exhausted from trying to get it. In all honesty, my concept of meditation in the Word was nothing short of drudgery.Messages of, “Meditate on the word”, sounded loud and clear through preachers I listened to in the 80s and 90s. They had scriptures to prove our necessity to do so. Here are a few examples that seemed so out of reach.
“This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.” Joshua 1:8 NASB 1995
“They delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night.” Psalm 1:2 NLT
My personal favorite to pray was from Mark 9:24. “I believe. HELP my unbelief!”
Like I said earlier, I was desperate and determined. I might be quiet but I am also tenacious. Thus began my perpetual exasperating treading on what I now refer to as my faith hamster wheel.
A typical trip to my faith hamster wheel involved me choosing one verse to meditate on for a whole hour. (Do you have any idea how long an hour can feel when you’re on a hamster wheel trying to go somewhere?) Any way… Day after day… I literally paced back and forth. Saying. And saying. And saying. The Same Thing. Over and Over. During my pacing and saying, I would check to see if faith had come. NOPE! Not that I could tell. I did this repeatedly because I was hurting and needed help.
God saw and heard my pitiful honest attempts to do whatever it was that I was supposed to do. He helped me through a simple message on a cassette tape.
The preacher got stuck in his sermon and kept repeating the phrase. “Faith comes. Faith comes. Faith comes.” He didn’t yell. He just calmly kept saying those words. Then he continued. “Faith will come. It will come. It will come.” He got sort of unstuck and exhorted us. “Do not t try to force faith or cram it down your throat. Just get up every day and spend time in the word. Eventually, you’ll find yourself down the road responding differently because somewhere along the line… faith came.”
I cannot even tell you how that one sermon revolutionized my view of meditation in the word. What a game changer!
The preacher on the cassette referred to verses from Mark 4.
“Jesus also said, “The Kingdom of God is like a farmer who scatters seed on the ground. Night and day, while he’s asleep or awake, the seed sprouts and grows, but he does not understand how it happens. The earth produces the crops on its own. First a leaf blade pushes through, then the heads of wheat are formed, and finally the grain ripens. And as soon as the grain is ready, the farmer comes and harvests it with a sickle, for the harvest time has come.” Mark 4:26-29 NLT
There is no imagery here of the farmer wringing hands and pleading for the seed to grow. He actually rested and went to sleep. The farmer did his part and trusted the seed to do its part. It was a process that took a while, but eventually that seed began to grow.
If you are in a similar struggle like I was, please take this to heart. Relax and don’t try to force faith. Spend time in God’s Word every day and eventually! You’ll find yourself responding differently and maybe even saying, Wow! Faith actually came! How? I don’t know, but I’m glad it did.
There are numerous ways to meditate in God’s word. I’ll share just a few because possibilities are limitless.
Listen to a Bible app while driving or going to sleep ● Get an old school Bible that you can mark up. ● What’s the best version? The one you’ll actually read ● Sing and hum songs with Scriptures. ● Make up random songs. ● Handwrite verses and stick them all over your house. ● Read through the whole Bible quickly or ponder one verse at a time. ● Listen to trustworthy teaching (There are still plenty of sincere godly ministers out there.) ● Invite friends over for coffee and bagels, read a few passages together, and share what stands out for each of you.
I am glad to say that I got rid of my faith hamster wheel. Growing in Christ is now joyful even on difficult days. And surprise, surprise! Though the process might take longer than I like, seeds planted eventually grow…. even when I go to sleep and rest.